Friday, January 30, 2009

Hot off the press... I mean GRILL:)

1. Do you and your spouse still celebrate Valentine's Day?
holiday's are stinky and NEVER meet my expectations. poor hubby has no chance. valentine's is the worst.
2. When's the last time you licked a stamp? why would you lick a perfectly good stamp??:)
3. How many clocks are in your home? that would require me to get up...
4. What holiday is closest to your birthday? usually Easter, but it moves around every year. Have actually had it ON my birthday a couple of times.
5. Do you cook anything the same way your mother made it when you were growing up?
crock pot roast, cream steaks, eggs... that's pretty much it. Oooo. and pie.
6. Do you pay bills online? you are supposed to PAY those???
7. Will you be gathering to watch the Super Bowl on Sunday? yup... but I have NO IDEA who is playing. I am going for the hot tub and the food. and the company, of course.
8. Have you treated yourself to something this week? do two fillings count?

Thank you Uncle Sam

After several hours this morning chained to my desk and computer I have finished my taxes, among other things. After printing off my bank statement for January, I have decided that I have made entirely too many trips to sonic. rats. Time to kick start the real resolution... getting out of this hole. Working on the budget for February, I have further decided that we need to make some changes around here for the coming year. No dish network... no internet? hmmm. do we really NEED to have a phone?? How bout that life insurance?

Moving on... It's cold down here. That white stuff has actually hung around a couple of days. Not on the road, mind you. Just on the top step of the deck so that the dogs don't want to risk going out into the yard. I am having the worst trouble potty training the baby this time. I have never had this much trouble. The frustrating part is that I know that is due to my own lack of diligence. crap. literally.

And... I've been messing around on this facebook thingy and have discovered a very nasty side to it. What if you don't WANT to be friends with someone? What if they are (gasp:) related to you? What if my playful banter is nunya? As in nunya business. Not anything bad, mind you. I am really not so stupid as to write something and post it on the internet that would come back to bite me. I mean, not REALLY... But, I have this thing that I do. It is a balancing act... kinda like the guy at the circus with all the plates spinning on big sticks. I have my "family world", where I have my place. my persona. my don't-be-mad-at-me-and-I-won't-be-mad-at-you. Then there is my "friend world". That is where I get to be me. I don't have to worry about whether I am accepted or whether I am ticking off someone who has the incredible ability to know just where to stick it to me. There is exactly ONE person who gets to be in both, with the exception of the ones who live with me. She knows who she is. (hi, Diane:)

I get that this is not a perfect solution, and quite possibly the source of the aforementioned ulcer, however it is the way that it is. I really didn't choose it, it just evolved and I am powerless to change it. It is how I keep peace. It is how I stay sane. It is how I get to keep the people in both worlds. I am not prepared to pick sides at this late stage in the game. It doesn't mean the people in one world are more or less important to me than the ones in the other. It just is.

So no, my sweet baby brother. I love you. I am here for you. But you cannot be my "friend"...

Wednesday, January 28, 2009

If only I had known

Brian is not healing like the ortho doctor thinks he should. He may have to have surgery. cha-ching. Needless to say, we are using that bone growth stimulator like crazy trying to make that darn bone grow.

It does this really cool thing. He has to tape the silly thing to his collar bone because the strap that it has on it is poorly designed to work on the collar bone... broken arm, fine. broken leg, fine... broken collar bone, not so much. Momma likes to use alot of tape, but Brian is pretty picky about the sticky. teehee. Oh looky Brian, I don't know how that tape ended up over your mouth:) Anyhow... once we have it properly placed he pushes the button on the timer thingy and he has sit in such a way as needed to have the probe make contact. It takes twenty minutes. If he moves wrong, it yells at him. BEEP. BEEP. BEEP. He then quickly adjusts his behavior in such a way as to please the beeper. Wow. I really could have used one of those a few years ago.

"Brian, don't throw those clothes on the floor... BEEP."

"Brian, pick up those dishes off of the table... BEEP."

"Brian, don't talk to your sister that way... BEEP."

"Brian, do your homework... BEEP."

Thinking about selling this ultrasound machine when we are done with it. Any takers?


So we had a little rain. a little ice. a little smattering of snowy stuff. So what.

Today I had an appointment with my doctor to discuss my health issues and some new symptoms that I have begun to have. I HATE going to the doctor, so the fact that I had actually made the appointment meant it was to THAT point. apparently not. I arrived at the doctors office to find the parking lot surprisingly empty. hmmm. pulled up to the door to find a cheerful little sign announcing, "we're closed:)" You don't say. I could have sworn that I made an appointment. My calendar says that you made the appointment for me, so what's up with the sign? I came home just sure that this little mix-up was due to the fact that I had arrive a little early.. Maybe you close the office during the lunch hour so that your staff can all run home at the same time to have lunch with their families, hence the empty parking lot. I came home and called the office, just to check. Nope. Answering machine says you are closed due to "inclement weather". YOU HAVE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME!!!!!!!!

Now, I realize that we have closed the schools today in Tipton county because, God forbid, that a child should be hurt trying to get to school. But, YOU HAVE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME!!! My dad lives in Wisconsin and has gotten about 65 feet of snow this year, starting around the fourth of July. It's a wonder that anyone up there is still alive.

But, we are adults and I find it reprehensible that a DOCTOR's office is closed when my driveway has nothing but puddles on it and I don't even OWN a show shovel. My appointment was at 1:15 pm. It must be 45 degrees out there, people. Now I realize that I have been homeschooling for a number of years and that, as such, I may have access to information that maybe the general public has forgotten... but, I am pretty sure that the freezing temperature of water is 32 degrees. I could be wrong, but I don't think so.

Add to that idiocy the fact that this doctor's office that was so concerned about my welfare that it didn't want me to risk my life to come in for a visit, neglected to call and let me know about this arrangement. Of course, it never occurred to me that if the parking lot at Walmart was packed that it would be too dangerous to drive to my own doctor's office so off I went. Stupid me.

Interestingly enough, my husband who is a service advisor for Mercedes Benz, dragged his little hiney out of bed and off to work an hour early this morning to give himself plenty of time to make the fifty mile drive downtown because he had appointments on the schedule today. Some rich woman in Memphis is getting an oil change today because my husband didn't use a little dusting of snow as an excuse to not go to work... but I have an ulcer that can wait.


Friday, January 23, 2009

Grilling Goodnesses

1. Have you ever ridden a horse? many years ago, when the horses were much closer to the ground.
2. Have you ever run out of gas? picture this... teenager. runs out of gas on two lane (busy) road. realizes something is terribly wrong yet inexperienced enough to not have a clue and with just enough warning to attempt turning around. station wagon ends up perpendicular to the road, across BOTH directions. little sister in the front seat. nuff said.
3. How many different schools did you attend growing up? 7
4. Do you have, and use, a library card? used to have and use. now I live in podunk town and have to pay $50 for the privilege. never mind.
5. Hand-wash or dishwasher? teenagers
6. Does your alarm clock beep or play music? beeps
7. Do you know how to roller skate? I know HOW. I also know HOW to make candy canes and pianos, but that doesn't mean I'm gonna.
8. What would you consider one of your biggest accomplishments? My kids... hands down.

life's questions

How does the mouse "know" when I am zooming in on the icon that I need and then pick that very moment to poop out?

Wednesday, January 21, 2009

The Circle of love

Monday night was our yearly visit to the local skating establishment. I guess it's not local, so much as it is a 45 minute drive from my house, but whatever. Anyway... for the past several years, First Baptist of Millington has made whatever arrangements are necessary for private access to this house of childhood glee and adult torture.

Everyone straps on the most hideous rental skates; me, while trying not to think of all of the feet that have been here before me. Of course there are always the "athletic" type who bring their own skates but I don't remember the last pair of skates I owned, thank you very much. I was probably twelve. The only reason that I put on these contraptions of death was because I distinctly remember the hum of the wheels under my feet. The feel of the wind in my hair. The exhilaration of turning a perfect corner... foot crossed over other foot. Shoot, I even remember what it feels like to spin all eight wheels in coordination until I was turning circles around my friends. I wasn't into sports as a kid. Was terrified of water skiing. Did most of the snow skiing on my face... but, I could skate. It was the perfect mix of terror and success for me. Not so much anymore:( I think that I went around the rink once.

Those wheels move much faster than they used to. And the ground is so much farther away. And the kids. Don't get me started on how FAST they fly by. My joints are so bad at this point in the game that seeing as how I have to tense EVERY muscle in my body just to stay upright that every little jerk feels like I'm in a car wreck. One time around. Off came the skates. I think that I will just watch from here on the side. where it's safe. and loud.

But, even from the side it was so cool to watch the kids with looks of pure joy on their faces. The little kids clinging to the side wall to try to catch the older ones. The middle size kids lending a hand to the smaller ones because in THIS rink they are brilliant. The teenagers laying aside their "coolness" for a moment to speed as fast as their bodies can with no one telling them to slow down. But the coolest thing for me was to watch the grown ups. For a short while, the DJ shooed the younger ones off of the rink to let the adults have free reign. For just a moment, they were kids again. The real kids lined up on the outside of the wall to watch their parents fly around the hard wood circle. What they saw was the years peal off of these givers of life. These protectors and disciplinarians and lovers of their offspring. They peeked in and saw their parents PLAY. As they played they began to pair off as if love itself drew them to each other. It was like a window into their past when they flirted and teased and held hands.

There, in the darkness of the side lines, with the music so loud that I couldn't hear myself think and the swirling black lights and the twirling disco ball I saw the circle of love. Moms and dads laughing with their children and with each other. The joy of spending time.

Thanks for the glimpse.

Friday, January 16, 2009

hot off the grill...

1. Do you like scary movies? not so much; definitely not if they are demonic in nature... really not into messing with that.
2. What kind of cell phone do you have? blackberry pearl that I just HAD to have, in spite of the "extra" cell package that I supposedly had to purchase with it... so not worth it, but now I have a contract so what's a girl to do?
3. Do you have a passport? a what port?
4. Has anything sad happened in your life this week? yup.
5. Have you ever broken any bones? no, but I am looking forward to stimulating my bone growth if ever I do.
6. Did you do anything this week that you don't normally do? I drove my kid to college because he was too drugged to drive himself.
7. What's the worst thing you ever had in your wardrobe? lime green gauchos with a matching vest. gotta love those thrift stores. I'm just saying.
8. Did you have braces on your teeth? nope. left 'em crooked.

Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Easy come. Easy go.

As I was figuring my taxes this morning, I was delighted to find that we had been giving Uncle Sam money hand over fist this year. As my sister will attest to, I generally abhor this behavior. As a bookkeeper, I feel it my patriotic duty to keep my "return" down to a minimum. This is not a savings plan, people. If you truly feel the need to have $50 too much taken out of your paycheck per week, then put it in an interest bearing savings account so that it is at least accessible during the year in case your roof comes off or something. But since 2007, when I had to PAY a considerable amount due to a miscalculation of my own personal highway robbery, I have been overly generous. That year happened to coincide with my "audit". yeah me. I had somehow missed a 1099 about five years before and we all know what the IRS does about penalties and interest and such. Needless to say, making payments to the IRS is not very high on my list of fun stuff to do before I die. Now, as I have stated, I have recently discovered that I need to file an amended return for last year. Hopefully I will have enough "returned" to me this year to correct that little blunder. Boy howdy, do I sound stupid. I have been filing our taxes for 24 years and have never had a problem until recently. Turns out that a foreclosure kinda complicates things. who knew?

Anyhow... just when I was feeling a little cocky about this year's return and planning a new fence and some landscaping doo dads. WHAM. Call from Smith and Nephew. Turns out that Blue Cross of TN has approved the doctor's prescription for the bone growth stimulator machine thingy. great. Turns out that by approve they mean, "sure you can have it, but you will be paying to first several thousand dollars in deductibles blah blah blah". Sure, I'll just write you a check. whatever.

Drove an hour away to the doctor's office to meet the lady from Smith and Nephew and take possession of this little miracle machine. Received directions for application, news about deductible, promises of magical growth progress. I really think that she should have at least taken me to dinner first, dontcha think?

Funny thing is that in all of this tax calculationing I have been reminded that we are paying nearly $10,000 per year for this "health insurance". Yeah, I said it... $9,613.24 last year to be exact. And the deductible and copays and uninsurables keep increasing... along with the price. There has got to be a better way.

In the mean time, I have purchased a bone growth stimulator that I will likely NEVER have use for again. At least, I HOPE not. And if I do, I am sure by then that this little box of ultrasound magic will be obsolete and I will be forced to buy something even more cool and expensive and ultimately useless.

Friday, January 9, 2009

Grilling goodnesses

1. What's your 'dream machine' - as in vehicle? Do you think you'll ever own it? right now I'm dreaming of an M class... as in Mercedes. Hubby works there so we would get a discount if ever I had the money. If this new job lead works out it's a distinct possibility within the next two years. Keep praying people.

2. Can you water ski? Yup. Learned behind my dad's boat as a kid. Was TERRIFIED every. single. time. After rupturing my eardrum last time we went tubing behind said boat I have NO desire to repeat that activity. Have I mentioned that I'm not so athletic???

3. What kind of milk to you prefer? We use 2% for drinking and cereal and stuff, but I have been keeping a little stash of whole on hand for cooking. Makes a big difference.

4. Have any of your pet peeves 'gotten your goat' this week? Like people bad mouthing me behind my back? possibly.

5. How do you prepare your taxes? HR Block, Turbo Tax, by hand - or does someone else do it for you? Past few years I have used Turbo Tax. I have a degree in bookkeeping and have found this to be quite sufficient, even when things got a little complicated. This year I need to branch out because I need to file an amended return on last year. Found a form I didn't know I had until too late. It's been in a box under my bed and I need to correct it before uncle sam finds out. yikes! In any case, I couldn't for the life of me figure out how to do that with Turbo Tax so I think I need to look for a little help this year.

6. Did you start a workout program this New Year? I have been walking... back and forth to the bag of stocking candy. Marshmallow santas are almost gone:)

7. Do you have a certain meal that you cook each and every week? that would probably be tacos or some variation of such. My family pretty much revolts if there is not some form of mexican around here every week.

8. When do you normally write your blog posts? whenever I want... did I mention that I no longer have a job?

Wednesday, January 7, 2009

Getting to the point...

is not generally my strong suit. I usually like to string along my story, sharing all the gory details, but at the risk of boring my considerable readership to death; here goes.

Last summer I spent several months in panic mode with bill collectors and gas prices etc. looking feverishly for actual employment (not to be confused with the little "pin money" I was making babysitting at home). After considerable stress, I was reminded that providing for my family was not my responsibility and therefore I was put on notice about my worrying. Turned down a couple of offers after that, including a request to return to my previously loved job. Fast forward a couple of months and low-and-behold the perfect job that I had hunted for all summer was basically handed to me on a silver platter. Was pretty sure that God was now letting me enjoy a new opportunity without the pressure of the responsibility for provision.

Much praying... weeks of hoping... waiting on right timing... excitement... planning... counting chickens... until SLAM. door shut.

Add to that, my job hunting last summer led to "my" kids being put on a waiting list for preschool (unbeknownst to me). So, opening for them for next Monday was taken. Now I am no longer babysitting AND I have no job.

Can you be BEHIND square one?

Saturday, January 3, 2009

Grilling goodness

1. If you could have done something different in 2008, what would it be?
I would not have let my son go to Colorado on the college ski trip.
2. What is something that you know will happen in 2009?
I know that the bill collectors will STILL be calling.
3. What is something that you hope will happen in 2009?
I hope that my new job will start. God told me to wait, and I am attempting to do that patiently; however, I am beginning to see the light at the end. woohoo!
4. Do you already have a vacation planned for this year?
hoping to make a little trip to Bay Springs for some camping before we open the pool.
5. Are you relieved that the holidays are over?
immensely, although my kitchen looks naked now.
6. Did you make a resolution? Will you share it?
REALLY want to lose some weight. whatever.
7. How old will you turn in 2009? 42.
8. What did you do to celebrate the New Year? watched the fireworks from the hot tub at my sister's new house.

Friday, January 2, 2009

Post ski trip

Okay, so maybe I need to get to the grocery store. Lunch today consisted of taco chips liberally sprinkled with cheddar... 30 seconds in the micro; chocolate covered marshmallow Santa with a Dr. Pepper chaser. Let the migraine commence.

I spent the better part of the morning on hold with the orthopedic surgeon's office trying to convince them that we should go ahead and get Brian in today instead of waiting til Monday. I mean I would have been convincing them if ever they had answered the danged phone. (spell check took "danged"... too funny:)

We are down to the last vicodin. I have scoured the medicine cabinet for stray narcotics to get us thru the weekend, since the doctor's office is apparently closed. Found a handful of mepergans left over from when he got his wisdom teeth out 3 years ago and an ocicodone left over from when his dad ruptured the disc in his back in 1998. Talked to my sister in law who is sending over the time released morphine... bless her heart.
In the meantime we are trying to keep the kid as comfortable as possible and seeing as how his collar bone is broken in two places and has yet to be "set", that is somewhat of a challenge. How bout them purple polka dots... borrowed the sheet from his sister. And, of course, Truly is at his feet to offer her support.
Stay safe y'all, and don't let your kids OUT OF YOUR SITE. Just kidding. sorta:)